I have been grumpy and moody. Not a trait that sits well with me or with people around me. But I cannot help it and I assure you there is a good reason, a very good reason.
I try hard; really hard to pull myself out of the situation and others around tell me that they have not seen me so lost, ever! Here I thought I was trying.
I look out the window and all I see is a thick blanket of early snow that we have received that is trying hard to melt only to ice over! The weather reporters report brightly that the temperatures are climbing up with a "Today is going to be sunny and chilly!" That only brings a smirk on my face and why not? Climbing from 21 to 24 F is not climbing really, is it? That Sun can shine in all the brightness he wants but can do nothing to the snow, is all I can think!
As I drive towards the library mumbling to myself about the fines I will end up paying, I listen to the radio, the carols play but they bring no joy. Then I get a frantic call from my DH with a "Where are you? This is becoming hard, reaching you!" Then he says he needs help! He is not able to get the paint out of his hands at work. Paint what paint? Then I remember that he was organizing some collaborative painting thing with his colleagues using oil paints. I am the one who has packed the stuff he needs - the canvas, the paints, the rags, even the painting I think they should do and then I realize I have not packed the turpentine. I sheepishly tell him that he can remove the stains only with turpentine. He goes turpentine, what turpentine? You never told me! I smile finally! Oh my painter, my big baby is all I feel and with that smile still in my voice I tell him to be careful with his shirt hoping I am not too late already! He seems happy to have got his wife's attention back!
My DS comes down ready for school in a red formal shirt talking about some White gift thing in school. I ask him absentmindedly if I have forgotten to send a gift. He shoots a look at me and says "No". I am surprised when I see him tuck his shirt in and suddenly my little baby looks all grown up. I ask him, "Hey handsome what's with this dressing up!" He smiles and goes on a rant about the white gift thing at school and that he is performing as part of the band. With shyness that seems to be synonymous with his age, he tells me that he is forced to wear a red shirt, tucked in! He is happy to have his mom's attention back!
My DD who has woken up early is cuddled up next to me, watching the page I am reading on the internet asks me what 'visa' means. I ask her to tell me instead what she thinks it is and she goes "Well, it is something that you use instead of money". Now I am back, completely back. I realize how lost I have been! I tell her that the visa I am reading about is the one we need to travel to other countries.
As I get out taking my DS to school I see the moon, the full moon that I seem to have missed! On our way back from dropping him, I am thrilled to see the lovely sky and the colors. Yes, the sun is coming up, our temps are climbing up, well we are touching the 40s anyways and I see flocks of birds on the streets, perching down on the roads and flying off together in a pattern at an approaching car. How did I miss all this? Where was I the last few days is all I can think when I hear my DD in the back seat go "Mom, you know the reindeer can go faster than cars!" I smile back at her through the rear view with a "They do! And how do you know that missy?" She has that smile, and raised eyebrows in affirmation and a nod as she answers "How else do you think Santa can get all the gifts to all the children in time? It is not some magic you know. I know it, for real!"
I come home, I peep out through the kitchen window and I even hear a bird chirp!
Then I see that I have my orchid in full bloom, well at least one flower and it is facing the wall. How did I even miss that? I turn it around to face the direction where I can see its pretty face and making a mental note of the next one ready to bloom readjust the other pots around it and with purpose, for I know I need to help that Santa deliver gifts on time in my house at least!
I try hard; really hard to pull myself out of the situation and others around tell me that they have not seen me so lost, ever! Here I thought I was trying.
I look out the window and all I see is a thick blanket of early snow that we have received that is trying hard to melt only to ice over! The weather reporters report brightly that the temperatures are climbing up with a "Today is going to be sunny and chilly!" That only brings a smirk on my face and why not? Climbing from 21 to 24 F is not climbing really, is it? That Sun can shine in all the brightness he wants but can do nothing to the snow, is all I can think!
As I drive towards the library mumbling to myself about the fines I will end up paying, I listen to the radio, the carols play but they bring no joy. Then I get a frantic call from my DH with a "Where are you? This is becoming hard, reaching you!" Then he says he needs help! He is not able to get the paint out of his hands at work. Paint what paint? Then I remember that he was organizing some collaborative painting thing with his colleagues using oil paints. I am the one who has packed the stuff he needs - the canvas, the paints, the rags, even the painting I think they should do and then I realize I have not packed the turpentine. I sheepishly tell him that he can remove the stains only with turpentine. He goes turpentine, what turpentine? You never told me! I smile finally! Oh my painter, my big baby is all I feel and with that smile still in my voice I tell him to be careful with his shirt hoping I am not too late already! He seems happy to have got his wife's attention back!
My DS comes down ready for school in a red formal shirt talking about some White gift thing in school. I ask him absentmindedly if I have forgotten to send a gift. He shoots a look at me and says "No". I am surprised when I see him tuck his shirt in and suddenly my little baby looks all grown up. I ask him, "Hey handsome what's with this dressing up!" He smiles and goes on a rant about the white gift thing at school and that he is performing as part of the band. With shyness that seems to be synonymous with his age, he tells me that he is forced to wear a red shirt, tucked in! He is happy to have his mom's attention back!
My DD who has woken up early is cuddled up next to me, watching the page I am reading on the internet asks me what 'visa' means. I ask her to tell me instead what she thinks it is and she goes "Well, it is something that you use instead of money". Now I am back, completely back. I realize how lost I have been! I tell her that the visa I am reading about is the one we need to travel to other countries.
As I get out taking my DS to school I see the moon, the full moon that I seem to have missed! On our way back from dropping him, I am thrilled to see the lovely sky and the colors. Yes, the sun is coming up, our temps are climbing up, well we are touching the 40s anyways and I see flocks of birds on the streets, perching down on the roads and flying off together in a pattern at an approaching car. How did I miss all this? Where was I the last few days is all I can think when I hear my DD in the back seat go "Mom, you know the reindeer can go faster than cars!" I smile back at her through the rear view with a "They do! And how do you know that missy?" She has that smile, and raised eyebrows in affirmation and a nod as she answers "How else do you think Santa can get all the gifts to all the children in time? It is not some magic you know. I know it, for real!"
I come home, I peep out through the kitchen window and I even hear a bird chirp!
Then I see that I have my orchid in full bloom, well at least one flower and it is facing the wall. How did I even miss that? I turn it around to face the direction where I can see its pretty face and making a mental note of the next one ready to bloom readjust the other pots around it and with purpose, for I know I need to help that Santa deliver gifts on time in my house at least!