Hi,
I have been looking for some advice from Indian married couples and lucky to find this site. I have some questions regarding Intimacy. Not exactly intimacy but emotional issues arising out of Intimacy issues. Please do not think it as a troll as I think this is more related to emotional issue though it may seem regarding Intimacy and I need some help. I'm in a foreign land and cannot go to Doctors as I feel foreign doctors may not understand Indian mind set and their problems.
I have been married for 6 months and it is an arranged marriage. So far, my husband has proved to be a very nice, supporting & caring guy. It has been a very good life since last 6 months except for one minor Intimacy issue. It looks minor and irrelevant to me but my husband looks at it as a major issue and he is getting disturbed a lot. He does not say anything but I can see that he is getting hurt a lot.
In the beginning, when we tried to get close and do IC(Intercourse), it was painful for me. So, he avoided doing IC seeing me in pain. He performed Oral on me and went down on me(Hope you get what I mean). Initially, I didn't like that but it was a very pleasant experience, one that I never had before marriage. After couple of days of doing this, we again tried IC but this time he had erection issues. It happened not once but on a routine basis whenever we tried. Again, he stuck to Oral. All this while, he would look after me and satisfy me but no pleasure for him(I mean no orgasm for him). Later, we figured out that it happened mainly due to condom that he was using. He brought in bulk all same style and they were causing issues. Once he changed brand, no more issues( Hope we had figured that out earlier)
But now, he is having premature ejaculation issues. Mostly, he climaxes early within 2 minutes. But whenever he holds it for longer, we come close to climaxing together but he climaxes first. He tries his best but I take time to orgasm. I curse myself for not climaxing early but cannot help. In short, I never had a orgasm with IC. Now, that he seen me orgasm during Oral, he feels that its his failure that he cannot make me climax by IC. He curses himself and since last 2 months, he is not at all trying for IC. He does oral on me and once I climax, he sleeps. I tried to initiate him for IC but he does not wan to do it. Says its a waste of time when he can't please me. He is hiding his pain and is doing his best to please me but I can see that it is affecting his confidence and he he sees himself less of a man. It doesn't affect me a bit but he for him, it seems like end of world.
Please, someone help me to make my husband get out of this. I'm worried that he may grow distant and I may loose him emotionally.
I have been looking for some advice from Indian married couples and lucky to find this site. I have some questions regarding Intimacy. Not exactly intimacy but emotional issues arising out of Intimacy issues. Please do not think it as a troll as I think this is more related to emotional issue though it may seem regarding Intimacy and I need some help. I'm in a foreign land and cannot go to Doctors as I feel foreign doctors may not understand Indian mind set and their problems.
I have been married for 6 months and it is an arranged marriage. So far, my husband has proved to be a very nice, supporting & caring guy. It has been a very good life since last 6 months except for one minor Intimacy issue. It looks minor and irrelevant to me but my husband looks at it as a major issue and he is getting disturbed a lot. He does not say anything but I can see that he is getting hurt a lot.
In the beginning, when we tried to get close and do IC(Intercourse), it was painful for me. So, he avoided doing IC seeing me in pain. He performed Oral on me and went down on me(Hope you get what I mean). Initially, I didn't like that but it was a very pleasant experience, one that I never had before marriage. After couple of days of doing this, we again tried IC but this time he had erection issues. It happened not once but on a routine basis whenever we tried. Again, he stuck to Oral. All this while, he would look after me and satisfy me but no pleasure for him(I mean no orgasm for him). Later, we figured out that it happened mainly due to condom that he was using. He brought in bulk all same style and they were causing issues. Once he changed brand, no more issues( Hope we had figured that out earlier)
But now, he is having premature ejaculation issues. Mostly, he climaxes early within 2 minutes. But whenever he holds it for longer, we come close to climaxing together but he climaxes first. He tries his best but I take time to orgasm. I curse myself for not climaxing early but cannot help. In short, I never had a orgasm with IC. Now, that he seen me orgasm during Oral, he feels that its his failure that he cannot make me climax by IC. He curses himself and since last 2 months, he is not at all trying for IC. He does oral on me and once I climax, he sleeps. I tried to initiate him for IC but he does not wan to do it. Says its a waste of time when he can't please me. He is hiding his pain and is doing his best to please me but I can see that it is affecting his confidence and he he sees himself less of a man. It doesn't affect me a bit but he for him, it seems like end of world.
Please, someone help me to make my husband get out of this. I'm worried that he may grow distant and I may loose him emotionally.